ROUND BALL FOOTY

Lucas, Lucas, Lucas....

2007-01-19T13:10:00.000+11:00

...you fucked up.

$125,000 a week won't hide the fact you swapped Anfield for West Ham. If/when they're relegated, you're going to look a right tit.

1-1 Australia V Ghana

2006-11-16T00:12:00.000+11:00

Well what a great night it was, not necessarily the score although 1-1 with the team we had was more than credible.

On a cold and windy London night an excitable crowd of over 14,000 turned up to watch the big game. The passionate/dancing/singing Ghanaians Vs the brightly clad and shouting Aussies.

The clash was not the most exciting battle you will ever see. The Socceroos contained Ghana's star players with aplomb.

Here is a few reviews of some standout players (remember you can stand out and be BAD)

Patrick 'Cool as a Cucumber' Kisnorbo played a staring role with only a freak mistake blighting his cool and calm performance.

Replacing Craig Moore in defence at half time was 'Keen as Mustard' Michael Thwaite, his eagerness while for some is contagious for me was to much. Sliding everywhere and dashing into challenges. A good effort by him but when you are used to the ladies favourite Lucas Neill gluing together the back line you always expect more.

Brett 'the Holster' Holman came on late and didn't manage to pull his pistol out and shoot fast, hard and accurate. No goals, one duffed shot.

Luke 'the cutter' Wilkshire has clearly been practising passing but seems to have forgotten the skill which comes most naturally to him, slicing through the air at opposition players legs, hips, torsos and on really good days heads. Good game form him although I still don't get it. Surely we have better midfielders to pull on the Green and Gold of The Socceroos.

Our Italian Dynamos put in another performance that can further stake their claims of being Australians finest midfielders, while being solid I want them to shine.

The Socceroos seem to be capable of holding their own now against all manner of opposition even with a glut of injuries. We are surely becoming a force to be feared.

The atmosphere at the game was exhilarating especially form the Ghanaians. Their singing and dancing warmed my heart on such a cold night.

Thank you Ghana for a great game. You might want to check your Goal Keeper though, what was the deal with him going up for crosses catching the ball and getting injured? While he could pull of three or four absolute screamers of saves and get up fine............

It was a night that the Queen herself may have attended had it not been for that more pressing of issues: 007 although was the new James Bond there.................

The night before

2006-11-14T03:43:00.000+11:00

Only one more sleep till kick off for the biggest post world cup match of 2006 to be held at Loftus Road, just spitting distance from every Aussies favorite place to celebrate anything even slightly Australian (this can be as simple as going for a beer) the Shepherds Bush Walkabout. Can the Socceroos defeat the current darlings of the African continent only time will tell.

In latest team news a few changes to the powerful Socceroos lineup. Lucas Neill (hamstring injury), Tim Cahill (knee) and Josip Skoko (hamstring) will all be missing from the clash on Tuesday this follows the earlier withdrawal of the pocket dynamo and almost leading scorer in the Scottish Premier league Scott McDonald.

So who to replace them with? Yep you guessed it Michael Beauchamp joins the squad. Along with Michael Thwaite, Ryan Griffith and Norway-based midfielder Kasey Wehrman who comes back into the national team fold after an absence of five years.

The future of the Socceroos will also be training with the squad Aaron Downes (Chesterfield), Trent McClenahan (Hereford United), Nick Ward (QPR), teenage attacker James Troisi (Newcastle United) and Neil Kilkenny (Birmingham City), who the Maestro Guus cleverly stole from England by playing him for 5 minutes in a pre World Cup fixture will all train with the squad. O yes the legacy of the mighty Guus will live on for many years to come.

The pre game atmosphere in London has been that of quiet waiting.
Will we perform?
Does Graeme Arnold really know what he is doing?
Which Michael Beauchamp will turn up this time? The champ or the chump?
Will the Walkabout live up to it's reputation?
Does anyone know who Shane Stefanutto or Brett Holman are?
Will Round Ball Footy the anthem for the Socceroos be playing one more time after another fine Socceroos showing?
We can only hope.

We here at RBF are happy to finally have something to rant about again.

Welcome back to the Socceroos, don't ever leave me again.

Get In!

Ghana Vs The Mighty Socceroos!

2006-11-09T00:25:00.000+11:00

Round Ball Footy is excited to announce that they will be at the clash versus Ghana on 14 November 2006

The battle of the teams that were knocked out in the second round of the world cup promises to be an epic encounter.

The Socceroos have announced an exciting looking squad of:John Aloisi (Alaves, Spain), Mark Bresciano (Palermo, Italy), Tim Cahill (Everton, England), Scott Chipperfield (Basel, Switzerland), Jason Culina (PSV Eindhoven, Netherlands), Brett Emerton (Blackburn Rovers, England), Vince Grella (Parma, Italy), Brett Holman (NEC Nijmegen, Netherlands), Patrick Kisnorbo (Leicester City, England), Scott McDonald (Motherwell, Scotland), Craig Moore (Newcastle United, England), Lucas Neill (Blackburn Rovers, England), Michael Petkovic (Sivasspor, Turkey), Mark Schwarzer (Middlesbrough, England), Josip Skoko (Wigan, England), Shane Stefanutto (SK Lillestrom, Norway), Mile Sterjovski (Basel, Switzerland), Luke Wilkshire (Twente, Netherlands)

No B-Chump I hear you say? And where is Archie? Nowhere to be seen that's where. A fully fledged all conquering squad of the finest European stars Australia has to offer is ready to take on the best of Africa.

Have we found a new weapon in Shane Stefanutto I don't know. Never heard of him. Heres a photo so we know who to look out for.

Mega Fauna-less 'Roos down Bahrain

2006-10-12T17:35:00.000+10:00

Comfortable win sets RBF-ers bitching across the country.

Ok, everyone likes goals. And we don't score so many. I can see this is a problem.

But I'm getting a bit sick of hearing about "disappointing this, disappointing that".

2-0 to us. How would you like to be a Pom - they haven't scored in 2 games, and get absolutely embarrassed by those dirty Croatians? Would you prefer that?

Chill the fuck out and wait and see what happens when the big Asian Cup matches roll in. Then you can start your bitch mouths flapping.

I don't want to hear it...

no more...

end of story...

Well...

Except to say this:

3-4-1-2. Anyone?

And (just to extend this rant a little longer), let's face it, there is no such thing as "full-strength squad" when you've got an injured Mega Fauna watching from the sidelines. Good to see the Dodo get a run though. How bout giving him a start now Arnie?

Also, props to the guy who re-monikered that defender who is supposedly the future of Australian football: Bitchamp - love it!

PS Is there a country call Byran? If so, I think we beat them last night too (must have been an Olyroo rematch after the first 90 minutes, or something).

Goodbye Poppa, Workhorse, Spider and Heartbeat ... hello B-Chump.

2006-10-08T16:48:00.000+10:00

After 88 minutes of frustration, RBF favourite Tony Popovic looked to have landed a dream retiree goal to give the Socceroos a deserved win against an uninspired Paraguay.

...Until a ridiculous injury-time blunder by "A-leaguer come good", Mickey Beauchamp, gifted a result back to the South Americans.

So, the four veterans didn't quite get the send-off they would've liked. But it seemed a fitting farewell, in that nothing has ever come easy to these 'Roos and it gives them a parting taste of all the heartbreak they have become accustomed to throughout their careers.

On the bright side, it was only a friendly, and if it teaches poor B-Chump not to act like a twit in his own penalty box in the Asian Cup, it will be a valuable lesson indeed.

So, bring on Bahrain next week ... but first bring back that young gun, Travis the Dodo. I likes the look of him (good nickname too).

Where is Round Ball Footy?

2006-09-26T02:18:00.000+10:00

A lot of people have been asking what has happened to Round Ball Footy......

Well folks let me tell you Round Ball Footy is as good and strong as it has ever been, It is the fire in all our bellies, the love of the game, the passion it evokes, the joy and the sorrow it must be Round Ball Footy!

A couple of months have passed now since the debacle of the World Cup: Won by those cheating cheating swine. The pain lingers, but the hope for new era is strong. In less then 4 years we will still know we were robbed and The Azzuri will still know they are cheats. And we will be able to exact revenge.

We here at RBF have taken it upon ourselves to find out what happened. Off to europe I went to get the answer of the big question: Do they know they cheated?

In France I met a man. Couldn't speak a word of English but still had the nerve to say hahahaha. The Azzuri - 1, Socceroos - 0, low low blow, but I guess you come to expect that from the Itallians!

Well it took a long time and a few countries but it seems they know that Grosso is a cheat, and a dirty one at that.

Three proud Italians drunk at Oktoberfest finally admited that Grosso did dive.

It has taken three months and a whole different continent but now we can rest a little bit easier.Safe in the knowledge that at least three Itallians know they didn't deserve to beat us.

I wonder if there is anymore out there?

Rant over.

VIVA THE REVOLUTION!

Go Girls!

2006-07-27T21:06:00.000+10:00

OK guys, move over - the Matildas are into next year's women's World Cup! As well as this they are playing in Sunday's Asian Cup final - either against China or North Korea, either of which would be a sweet victory.

Let's not forget about our girls, or about their commitment to the 2000 Olympic games in Sydney. Sure, half of them don't play in the team any more, but who will ever forget this...

Our magic Socceroo squad, World Cup Germany 2006

2006-07-17T20:46:00.000+10:00

For posterity, RBF is listing the 23-man Socceroos squad for the World Cup 2006.

Here are Australia’s champions who enchanted a nation and kept them up really really late in the dead of winter.

We’ve also deigned to give them each a score out of 10, to give a little indication of the glory each one has achieved. Round Ball Footy fans are welcome to let us know if we’ve got it right or wrong – post your comments here.

The Round Ball Footy Socceroos 2006

Mark Schwarzer 9/10
There's only 1 Schwarzenator. Unfortunately, he used up all his miracle saves in the Dutch friendly and couldn’t pull another one out against that Totti bastard.

Lucas Neill 11/10
Deserved the Young Player of the Tournament award (Podolski? What did he ever do, apart from look like Casper the Friendly Ghost?) But Lucas, why did you fall over?

Craig Moore 10/10
Clever enough to pinch that spot kick off the V-Bomber before he realised what was going on.

Tim Cahill 11/10
On track for the Golden Shoe before we were unjustly booted out. Has anyone figured out why Hero Timmy wasn’t awarded his third against the Cro’s?

Jason Culina 8/10
Member of the Secret Midfield Trio with Chippers and Sterjo. He loves the Guus maybe more than anyone.

Tony Popovic 7/10
It’s a little-known fact that if he hadn’t pulled a hammy just before halftime against Brazil, we would have gone on to win the game.

Brett Emerton 9/10
We suspect he was getting frisky with some young girls in the referees’ staff room; how else to explain all the yellow cards he got?

Josip Skoko 10/10
Poor Skokes: Maestro Guus was obviously ready to unleash him in a quarter final slaughter against the Ukraine. We had him pencilled in for a mighty double.

Mark Viduka 9/10
V-Bomber was the worst hit by reffing atrocities. ‘No goals’, you say? Every bloody time he looked at the ball he had a foul called on him.

Harry Kewell 10/10
It was worth it just for that second equaliser to put us into the final 16.

Stan Lazaridis 11/10
Workhorse, veteran, spiritual leader. His contribution to the team spirit was so profound, it has been left unsaid by every single player.

Ante Covic 7/10
Failed to talk Spider out of contesting the #1 spot; didn’t cheer up the Schwarz when he got dropped.

Vince Grella 10/10
The Jaffle is the most ocker Socceroo going, even after having played in Italy for years.

Scott Chipperfield 9/10
Chippers was, quite simply, the most outstanding bus-driving midfielder of the tournament.

John Aloisi 10/10
One of our 4 goal-scorers, Johnny Weezy was a ducking-and-weaving machine whenever he was on the pitch.

Michael Beauchamp 10/10
Didn’t do, or say, anything. Very well disciplined.

Archie Thompson 10/10
No game time, but he did do an Angus Young impersonation with a corner post after our result against Croatia.

Zeljko Kalac 10/10
Made arguably the biggest impression of all. No one will forget you, Spider.

Joshua Kennedy 12/10
The original and best Mega Fauna. Joshie is the reason that Germany 06 will be remembered as Year of the Mega Fauna!

Luke Wilkshire 9/10
No one really knew how he managed to get a start, but the Cutter actually played well against Italy.

Mile Sterjovski 9/10
Chippers’ best mate, Milly was another ‘Roo who played out of skin. Equal with The Cutter Wilky for overachiever of the tournament.

Mark Milligan 10/10
As with Boochy, kept his nose clean and the bench warm.

Marco Bresciano 8/10
Just needed one magic strike to gain immortality. Unfortunately those bloody Germans never showed him how to hit the secret sweet-spot on those new super FIFA balls.

Guus Hiddink 11/10
Maestro Guus: what more needs to be said? 8 seconds away from taking us into the semi and beyond. Come back soon!!

Merci Zizou

2006-07-13T09:51:00.000+10:00

Grosso you better watch out he's coming for you next!

Here is a sweet game were you can headbut all the dirty Italians you want.

Enjoy! I certainly did!

The fans have spoken

2006-07-12T21:42:00.000+10:00

Hero Timmy says it's a shame about Houllier not getting the top job, but do we really need him? Stand up Australia and give yourselves a big pat on the back, you have voted with your fingers and the FFA have listened.

So the next question is who SHOULD take the Socceroos to World Cup victory in 2010? Here are some of the top contenders in our eyes:

Workhorse Stan

Isn't he really the natural choice? With his wealth of World Cup sidelines experience, he has the skills and temperament to take the boys all the way to the final. Come on FFA, spare him the A-league monotony.

John Travolta

After volunteering to fly the Socceroos to Germany this year, he has shown the passion, commitment and desperate craving for public attention that is needed in the top job. Plus he's pashed Olivia Newton John. Come on FFA. We could even get him singing the new anthem for the socceroos at half time.

Marcello Lippi

He's available and he has the runs on the board. Maybe he can give us some tips on how to become as dirty as the filthy, stinking, cheating winners? Or maybe the ref would just say we were cheating...

Or will the FFA finally see the error in their ways and just bring back the Maestro? There's nothing a good Russian Mafia hit squad can't fix.

The choice is yours Australia. Make sure the FFA hears you.

Super Tim, Super Tim, Super Timmy Cahill

2006-07-11T09:34:00.000+10:00

How many dudes you know roll like this?

How many dudes you know flow like this?

Not many, if any!

Not many, if any

How many dudes you know got the skills to go and rock a show like this?

Uh-uh, uh-uh, I don't know anybody...

Thanks for the memories Timmy.

A new breed of hero

2006-07-10T20:53:00.000+10:00

Does Round Ball Footy have a new hero? No, not another dirtiest-player award, but rather the winner of the RBF bad-loser award.

As if world player of the year, World Cup golden ball winner 2006, captain of your country, World Cup goal scorer and hero to the masses wasn't enough, Zinedine Zidane earns an eternal place in the hearts and minds of all RBF fans by making the stupidest mistake in World Cup history, being sent off with only 10 minutes to go in the World Cup final. Forget the many achievements over his long career, the parting image for the France captain will forever be him rearing back in anger, lowering his head and launching his bald crown into the chest of Italy defender Marco Materazzi after the two exchanged words while walking down the field in extra time. Brilliant!

Zizou we salute you as a true hero of international football. 20 million Australians say "merci" as an ambassador of what RBF is all about. Well done. The only question is why couldn't you have chosen that bastard Grosso as the target of your Newcastle kiss? Or for that matter all of the other filthy stinking 10 players while you were at it?

Now that would have been worth ruining your reputation for.

A gift from above

2006-07-10T19:08:00.000+10:00

Oh how it hurts. Italy world champions. I cannot think of anything worse. At least we can take small solace in this gift from the Round Ball Footy gods. They feel sorry for the way they have treated our mighty Socceroos and are begging us to forgive them, so they give us......
Small consolation for the bull shit way we were kicked out of the cup, but at least it might take your mind off Italy winning the damn thing for a moment or two.

Why? Round Ball Footy Gods, Why?

2006-07-10T16:11:00.000+10:00

Yes it's true, it's not a nightmare only contained in your head, don't bother pinching yourself so you can wake up from this horrible nightmare and it will all be fine because it won't!

Italy are World Champions, and now it is time to try and accept this absolute travesty. Oh and who would step up to take the decisive penalty? Yes folks Round Ball Footy's biggest cheater Grosso .

Why do you scorn us Round Ball Footy gods? We have done nothing but praise your greatness and yet you keep letting dirty stinking Grosso take to the field and help his cheating nation lift the World Cup. Why? Why? Why?

Please make it go away........ Please I beg of you.

Tonight is the night

2006-07-09T13:22:00.000+10:00

As the Spice Girls so famously sang "Tonight is the night, when two become one". Well for a few more hours there are two teams left but tonight truly is the night when two become one.

One team will be left standing and crowned World Champions.

Tonight pits the dirty Azzuri of Italy Vs the Stinky Les Blues of France in a no holds bared winner takes all contest, with the ultimate prize at the end of the game.....

Round Ball Footy Champions of the World!

Oh what could of been

Germany Third

2006-07-09T09:58:00.000+10:00

Germany have managed to take a small consolation from the World Cup they have so proudly hosted by finishing in third.

While the game will probably not be remembered for much more than 24 hours, it did have a few special moments, but alas it didn't bring back those special feelings.

German goalkeeper Oliver Kahn, made his first appearance at the World Cup after being relegated to the bench for the serious part of the tournament, yes that part human part cyborg wall from 4 years ago finally got a game in this super battle for national pride. So that was nice.

Bastian Schweinsteiger scored with two piledrivers to set up victory for the Germans. Add an own goal by Portugal and a cheeky goal by Portugal (at the right end this time) and you finish with a final score of 3-1 congratulations Germany, at least your fans finally had something to be happy about.

Just a quick reminder, the final is on tonight, just in case you forgot.

Lucas Neill & Posh Spice?

2006-07-08T11:36:00.000+10:00

Posh Spice is a slapper
She likes to cop a feel
and when she's shagging Beckham
She thinks of LUCAS NEILL!

Yes even Posh Spice loves Lucas Neill, it is a craze that is sweeping the globe.

Sorry I digress, not a bad little chant though, I am sure you will admit, 22 more to go Round Ball Footy fans, one for each squad member. Go and get creative and put them in the comment section in this post.

Anyway 4 teams left, tonight the mighty battle for third and fourth should be a cracker! Portugal Vs the host nation Germany. Who will win? Does it really matter? Probably not, but at least it is one more chance to watch a cracking game of Round Ball Footy before what promises to be a less than inspiring final.

Dearest Round Ball Footy World Cup,

2006-07-07T15:11:00.000+10:00

O, Round Ball Footy World Cup, where did it all go wrong? We were so good together.

Sure, we didn't always get along: there were times when we just couldn't figure out why you wanted to hurt us the way you did. And those awful men you hung around with really had it in for us.

Other times, it seemed just like a fairytale: you were coy at first, teasing us with rejection, until we finally scored ... once, twice, three glorious times!

Those were wonderful moments we had together – such giddy highs.

Now it seems that you've drawn apart, let us down, and now we're going our own separate ways.

O, Round Ball Footy World Cup, we can't help but feel that:

'You've lost that loving feeling; oh, that loving feeling; you've lost that loving feeling; now we're gone, gone, gone ... and we can't go on...

...Whoa-whoa-woah.'

How could you have left us for those slutty Italians and sleazy French?

Les Bleus Vs The Azzurri

2006-07-06T18:04:00.000+10:00

Yes its true, everyone's worst nightmare has come true. We are going to have to put up with either the French or Italians telling us that they are world champions, for four years! Surely we could have a replay of just the second round starting with that match against those filthy dirty.....

So folks here we are Italy Vs France and as the Highlander so famously said "there can only be one". Wouldn't it be great to see these two old foes take to the field wielding swords and trying to chop each others heads off, couldn't fake that could you Grosso? What am I saying? If you can get that damn penalty against Australia you can do anything!

Unless these two teams take to the field with razor sharp swords and the desire for blood, I am predicting this game to be a dour affair. I am predicting 3-all, Dour?....... dour? I hear you say "6 goals - surely it can't be boring". Well yes folks 6 penalties: 3 to Grosso and 3 to Henry that diving Frenchman. Followed by even more penalties in the Penalty Shootout.

Final winner? Well the last team to have someone with their head left attached to their body of course.

There can be only one.......

ROUND BALL FOOTY

2006-07-05T17:51:00.000+10:00

Noooooooooooooooooo!

2006-07-05T07:59:00.000+10:00

Yes it's true. The Azzuri,the team no one wanted to make the final has qualified.

I cannot fucking believe it! I wish it wasn't true.

And that bloody Grosso has done it again! Yes, the same Grosso who so famously dived across Aussie Superhero Lucas Neill to win his dirty team a penalty in the only way they know how, by cheating. That dirty cheat Grosso scored the decisive goal in the 118th minute, the ball was passed out to him and in his attempt to fling himself across the box to win another bodgy penalty, he accidently got his foot to the ball and it was in. Goodbye Germany.

Oh yeah another goal was scored but who cares. Final score: 2-o to Italy.

I can't believe I actually am going to have to sit through another bloody Italy game........

Deutschland Uber Alles

2006-07-04T21:27:00.000+10:00

Go you good things in the Casper the Friendly Ghost outfits. (Just don't trip over your jerseys!)

Look at all of your well-wishers and supporters. You couldn't possible let them down, could you?

Now go smash that dirty, dirty cheating Italy.

Just in case you forgot...

2006-07-04T21:23:00.000+10:00

Now that we've all calmed down, we can look back objectively upon the debacle of a penalty that Italy were awarded against the gallant Socceroos.

I think Timmy's summed it up nicely.

'Anyone who watched the game can blatantly see that we were robbed'
–Timmy ‘Hero Who Speaks the Truth’ Cahill

Well said.

Dirty Italy at it again

2006-07-04T21:00:00.000+10:00

Once again, the Azzurri (‘dirty blues’) have managed to influence a game by bending the rules – let’s face it: cheating. Having already committed the heinous crime of shamelessly diving against our ‘Fair-Go’ Socceroos, the Italian media are now in on the shenanigans.

Star German midfielder, Torsten Frings, has been cruelly punished by FIFA after Sky Italia dobbed him in. Torsty was all set to play in tomorrow’s semi against the dirty Italians, until Sky Italia found footage of a nice left hook by Frings against an aggro Argentinian and handed it into Sepp’s boys.

The sign reads: ‘We’ve cheated before, and we’re only getting better at it.'

That’s why Round Ball Footy declares Sky Italia and the Italy team joint winners of the RBF Dirtiest Team-Effort Award.

(Following Josip Simunic’s previous award of Round Ball Footy Dirtiest Solo-Effort Award. Don’t worry, you can keep that trophy, Josie.)

Congratulations, you dirty bastards, you’ve managed to overshadow the match-fixing scandal that half the Italian World Cup team is involved in … by sinking even lower.

Italy, once again, you are a disgrace. Good luck to those Germans in the Casper the Friendly Ghosts outfits (they of the over-sized team jerseys).

Podolski: German striker or friendly ghost?

Gerard Who-llier?

2006-07-03T14:07:00.000+10:00

Why Andriy why?

2006-07-01T10:09:00.000+10:00

You let those pasta-loving, olive-growing fascists walk all over you and march into the semis like they marched into North Africa. Did you really expect to be facing the Socceroos? Would the Socceroos have beaten you by five goals? Probably. That, my fellow RBF fans, is the chance we've missed - probably our best chance ever to become one of the illustrious final 4 at the world cup. And it's all down to one special man. Wanker. And once in the semis, who knows what can happen?

Well, fortunately we do. Thanks to Jens Lehmann, at least the Germans will shaft those stinking Italians in the next match and ensure they get nowhere near the holy grail. In the immortal words of Colonel Klink, "no one has ever escaped from Stalag 13".

RBF are hoping for a Germany v Portugal final, like the rest of the world.

Friday

2006-06-30T15:36:00.000+10:00

It's amazing how one one absolutely terrible decision can change a Friday night for a whole nation.

Instead of being able to stroll down the pub and cheer on Australia against Ukraine we now have to do the exact opposite, and actually barrack for the Ukraine.

The only consolation is they do wear yellow, and if you squint your eyes or have had a couple to many, you may just be able to imagine that's Viduka scoring that goal tonight, and celebrating with Luke "the cutter" Wilkshire and teammates taking Australia to its rightful place, the Semi-finals of Germany 2006.

O yes it would be wonderful if it were true, but alas, it's not.

At least we can take pleasure at hurling abuse at the Italians, as they are hopefully crushed by the World Cup debutants.

Come on Ukraine do it for the teams that wear yellow (except Brazil they need no help), and spank those Italians senseless, do whatever is necessary, just please beat them!

Tonight I have an empty space in my heart, as I think about what should of been........

‘Roos of the future

2006-06-29T16:05:00.000+10:00

The Socceroos have had an awesome impact during their 15 days at the Round Ball Footy World Cup in Germany 06. There’s been so much to reflect upon (and get very worked up about), but so much to look forward to.

See you, Boss. We love you. Don't forget about us over there in Russia.

Unfortunately, we all knew that our Maestro Guus would be leaving us, and now we’ve got to find ourselves a new Maestro to lead us through the Asian Cup, into the Beijing Olympics and on to ROUND BALL FOOTY GLORY IN 2010!!

RBF takes a moment to mull over some of the changes that will occur.

A new Maestro?

The big-money question. Who will it be?

It's hard to say, there'll be a lot of high-power discussions and wheeling-and-dealing in the FFA boardrooms. But Round ball Footy is sure of one thing:

Oh dear God, no!!!

We'll just leave you with that shocking thought ... just don't let it happen, Round Ball Footy fans!!

The retirees...

It’s the end of an era for many Socceroos, some of our golden oldies will be:

Tony Poppa, Workhorse Stan (pictured) and Capt’n Craig – they will lead an exodus into the A-League and international retirement.
Boxhead: soon-to-be A-League workhorse

(We don’t know where the Fumble-Spider will end up.)

It looks like Weezy and the mighty Shwarzenegger will continue on as regular starters till they drop dead – along with our ‘youngsters’: Boy-Wonder Lucas, Hero Timmy, Jason Culina, the Jaffle, Bresha, and the Mega Fauna himself, Joshua Kennedy.

(V-Bomber may try and have a few more kickabouts in the Green & Gold, but if he doesn’t score in his next 2 games, he’ll be outta there too.)

Onya boys!

I’m definitely aiming at still being around. My goal is to be there with Australia in 2010
-Mark Schwarzer

Referees for Aussie games

2006-06-29T09:43:00.000+10:00

These are the four so called "refs" of the Aussie games. We faced a total penalty count of 98 against and only 59 for.

Essam Abd El Fatah (Egypt). Despite his refereeing we won this game, he is still crap and should go home. Fouls: Australia 22 - Japan 11.

Markus Merk (Germany) Fouls: Australia 25 - Brazil 9.

Dude just PISS OFF!

Graham Poll (England). What a disaster this fella turned out to be, have you got any idea about what you are doing My Poll. Fouls: Australia 25 - Croatia 22, remember this match featured Round Ball Footy's first inductee into the Hall of Dirtiness Josip Simunic so we all know that's just Bull Shit. Get out of the World Cup. See ya!

Luis Mendaja Cantalejo what a crap referee! Thanks for kicking us out of the World Cup Mr Cantalejo, Fouls: Australia 26 - Italy 17, Including that RIDICULOUS PENALTY!

You're a wanker!
Yes, I am still very bitter about this Mr Cantalejo.

So who deserves to be in the 8?

2006-06-28T18:38:00.000+10:00

So how many of the illustrious "last 8" deserve to actually be there?? With the successful refereeing of the RBF Socceroos behind us, we take a look at the other contenders for the crown that should have been ours.

Germany - Definitely Yes! They're hosting the damned thing and nobody does a beer festival or neo-nazi rioters quite as good as them. They've also shot at the English and hate the Italians.
Argentina - Definitely Yes! They're the only country in our lifetimes to have challenged the English to a duel. Sure they lost, but they made the English look pathetic. They were the country we took refuge in before the Uruguayan clash and, like us, they can have barbecues at Xmas time.
Italy - ??? I'll leave that decision to you, but here's some reading material. GO HOME you filthy cheating turds.
Ukraine - Definitely Yes! The only country which has polluted most of northern Europe in the space of a few days and the only team that you can only name 1 player from. Do they actually have 11 players? We're not sure. They are also the team who will ensure the final 4 are scum-free. GO UKRAINE.
England - Er, hello, No! For those of you who have bothered watching any England matches (and why would you?), you will know they are the only team in the final 8 (with 1 possible exception) who have not deserved to actually win any games. Plus they're English. And they think they deserve to be there. And they have "Pepsi". How many reasons do you need?
Portugal - Definitely Yes! The only team (along with Ukraine) in the final 8 who have not won the world cup a billion times and the only team who can understand what the Brazillians are saying. Handy.
Brazil - No, not really but only because they'll probably win without even trying. Call that ENTERTAINING FOOTBALL??? Bastards. What the hell happened to Togo anyway?
France - Definitely No! They're smelly and they're French. C'est la vie, mon ami.

The show must go on

2006-06-28T16:13:00.000+10:00

Well the dust has settled, the tears seem to have stopped for now at least (just don't mention that moment) and I guess with great reluctance, it is time to accept that there is still a World Cup to be won.

Only 8 teams are left and here is the draw.

Hopefully Italy will get spanked by the radiation fuelled and Shevchenko lead Ukraine in the quarter finals.

At least the Ukraine wear yellow and lets face it Round Ball Footy fans, yellow is the new black.

Who else to support? Now that's a tough one. Any ideas Round Ball Footy fans?

That game against Italy.......... and that

BLOODY PENALTY!!!!!!

Oh no. I shouldn't of thought about that again, quick pass me a tissue...........

Ned Zelic

2006-06-28T09:13:00.000+10:00

Not sure if everyone thinks he's a tool, but here is a site made by some like minded people. Ned Zelic "Fansite".

Be Proud Australia

2006-06-27T16:22:00.000+10:00

Today will go down as the day Australia got knocked out of the World Cup.

Round Ball Footy fans we must be proud of the effort that the Socceroos made. Love the Green and Gold, wear your Socceroos scarf everyday for the rest of winter, and most of all love your Round Ball Footy! Over the past weeks we have lived, breathed and died by the Round Ball.

Aussie fans all over the world can be proud of the achievements of the Socceroos.

It has begun Round Ball Footy fans
VIVA THE REVOLUTION!

Please don't forget about our mighty Socceroos, they will be back and need you more than ever!

Just because we are knocked out doesn't mean we have to stop singing! So go on download the song have a beer and a sing!

Italy are a disgrace

2006-06-27T14:10:00.000+10:00

We all know the story:

Australia is dominating a tiring, 10-man squad as extra time approaches. Italy, knowing that they can't last another 30 mins and that the Socceroos will run over the top of them, resort to their only real 'talent': diving.

(We all know that the main function of Serie A is diving practice for Italians and match-fixing shenanigans behind the scenes.)

Grosso beats a couple of players on the left flank, reaches the penalty area, and hurls himself over the fallen Lucas Neill.

The Dive

He's milked the penalty, and not even the Shwarzenator can pull off the miracle save to restore justice to this horrible, farcical ref decision.

With disbelief, it seems that our World Cup has ended the way it began: with no luck from those bastard refs.

It shouldn't have ended this way.

With no other teams impressing for 2nd-team supporting rights, it looks like we'll be left to ponder who we hate more right now: Italy (for being filthy divers and crap match-fixers) or Spain (for sending us that stinky, Grosso-loving ref).

Italy, you are a disgrace. Catch some radiation when you're diving all over the Ukraine.

That Hurt

2006-06-27T09:50:00.000+10:00

OUCH!!!!! Hey Ref that hurts.

Almost as much as this......

You bastard

Rorted

2006-06-27T03:31:00.000+10:00

Bullshit, ref.

That's all for now. Too upset...

The new biggest RBF game ever!!

2006-06-26T12:22:00.000+10:00

After having endured a succession of 3 'biggest Round Ball Footy games ever', Australia is gearing up for the next in the series: the new biggest Round Ball Footy game ever!!

So many questions remain unanswered—but not for long!!

Will the Geezer play?

Of course he will, dragging himself off the bench to limp around the attacking third for the last 20 minutes (of regulation time).

Who will replace Emmo?

The first Guus tactic will be to try to fool FIFA into believing that ‘The Cutter’ Wilkshire was responsible for Emmo’s 3 cards, meaning that Brett will be able to take the field after all.

Plan B, obvious enough, is to start with Bresha—so thankfully Chippers won’t be ruining any more set-pieces for us.

How much will we win by?

It’s hard to say, but looking objectively at the two teams, it seems that the game can realistically only go one of two ways:

• we win by plenty OR
• we crush their fragile pale-blue hearts in the penalty shoot-out: 3–nil (after only 6 attempts) is enough for us.

Just over 12 hours to go till we all find out!!

Poor Emerton, poor Kalac

2006-06-25T20:57:00.000+10:00

One got screwed by the ref...

...the other just screwed up.

We won’t be seeing either of them tomorrow night.

Looking ahead...

2006-06-25T20:38:00.000+10:00

The Round Ball Footy Datamatronic has been working overtime to chart Australia’s progress through the final rounds of the World Cup. In an international, world, global exclusive we can reveal the make-up of the final for Germany 06.

And it’s looking like the Socceroos will be lining up against Brazil in the Round Ball Footy World Cup final. What a game this’ll be!!

That’s right—a much-anticipated rematch of the age-old Group F rivals will take centre stage this year in Germany.

After hard-fought tussles with Argentina and the Portugal, respectively, the big-hearted ‘Roos will have the chance to exact sweet sweet revenge on the Samba Boys.

Turns out that 19 June was just a dress rehearsal for the biggest Round Ball Footy game in the world: the Cup final. Who will emerge victorious??

Round Ball Footy doesn’t want to give the game away. But with the benefit of having hacked into the FIFA communications department intranet, we have a strong feeling that the Socceroos will put the disappointment of the Markus Merk–led defeat behind them ... to trounce the Selecao in an ugly battle.

Having learnt their lessons from the group stage, the ‘Roos will put on a cultured display of diving and simulation the likes of which has never before been witnessed—leading Australia to a 2–0 victory over the naive Brazilians!!

Ha!!! (that was the last laugh). Ha ha!!!!

Last 16 and beyond

2006-06-24T10:08:00.001+10:00

What a wonderful day. The final group games have been played and there is only 16 teams left to fight it out for World Cup glory.

No it's not a dream, Australia only needs to win 4 more games to lift up the most prized trophy in world sport. The first of these games is against Italy.

A team whose reputation is that of potential world champion. Round Ball Footy feels their bark is bigger than their bite. Give us a unbiased ref , a even playing surface and of course a round ball and there is no reason to think that Australia cannot defeat The Azzuri.

With defeat of Italy behind us the Socceroos would face the winner of the game between Ukraine and Switzerland in the Quarters. It is not unbelievable to dream of the Socceroos playing in a Semi Final on 4 July in Dortmund.

and then who knows...........

Was that really real?

2006-06-23T20:46:00.000+10:00

Yes, Round Ball Footy fans, there is a Santa Claus (and fortunately he’s not on the FIFA payroll).

Stop pinching yourselves, it’s true:

WE ARE INTO THE SECOND ROUND!!!

Some words that have been used to describe the Aussie win over Croatia:

· Courageous
· Amazing
· Wonderful
· Euphoric
· Lion-hearted
· Momentous
· Justice
· Johnny (not really an adjective, but people sure were saying it a lot)

(As RBF scored it, we won 4–1. The 2 that stood; Timmy’s 92-minute goal; and if the two blatant penalties were awarded: Lucas nails one, V-Bomber sprays his wide. That Kalac thing never happened, forget about it. 4–1.)

The sweetest dawn.
When the sun rose over
a new era in Round Ball Footy.

S'cuse me, there's something in my eye...
I'm off to the pub!!

Newsflash: ref has shocker in Aus vs another team!!

2006-06-23T20:33:00.000+10:00

Once again, Australian Round Ball Footy fans were treated to a succession of bewildering ‘judgement’ calls by the ref, this time it was pommy bastard Graham Poll.

Among the lengthy list of dubious decisions made in the Croatia game, we offer you some highlights:

· Inaugural winner of Round Ball Footy’s Dirtiest Player Ever award, Josip Simunic, tries to kick Hero Timmy in the face, inside the penalty box, pommy bastard awards dirty Simunic a free kick.

· Simunic (dirty, as mentioned above) crash-tackles the V-Bomber, again inside the penalty box. Spot kick? What are you, a European club?—it seems that Dukes is lucky not to get a red for diving.

· Some fucker takes a piggy-back on the V-Bomber, Dukes fouled for ‘backing into the man’.

· Simunic pulls Mega Fauna to the ground (pictured), proceeds to chop down ‘Arry. Even Graham ‘Pass it under the table’ Poll sees that one: second yellow for Dirty Simunic.

· 1+1=2; 2 yellows=1 red; red card=send-off. ‘Not on my watch’, says Poll (apparently he was refereeing this game—I’m not sure this display qualifies as refereeing): Simunic continues on.

· In the dying stages, as a Bresciano cross comes in, Mega Fauna is completely taken out again, leaving Timmy to run into an open net. Cahill recovers his lead in the race for the Golden Boot. ‘Nah! That’s time!’, announces Poll, producing a third yellow for Simunic (dirty), but forgetting to actually blow time-off to end the game.

Thank Christ we got through!!

NB. The above list is merely a modest selection of ref blunders going against the Socceroos—in addition to the other baffling fouls against Australia in the first 2 games (as mentioned in Round Ball Footy’s earlier whinge).

In the words of Craig Foster, ‘the ref had a shocker!!’ They all have, Fozzie, they all have.

Is the Maestro ever wrong?

2006-06-23T16:15:00.000+10:00

"The goalkeeper is always under big pressure. I wasn't really nervous but I am very disappointed that I couldn't stop such an easy shot. The goal was obviously my fault."

Zeljko KALAC (AUS)

Thursday 24th June 2006

Well DER... Goalkeeping is about safety, reliability and strength, and sadly the RBF Socceroos didn't have this in their game of the Croatian 7 (plus a few Aussies) versus the Croatian national team. Was this the result of nerves, overconfidence, a pay-off or just a bad curry? Does Kalac also own a villa? Is there a chance he could be a stinking traitor? We'll never know, but I'm confident we'll see our Aussie mate Mark Schwarzer (Germany's part of Australia, isn't it?) chained to the goalposts for the rest of the World Cup competition.

With only 4 games to go until the Socceroos win the world cup, a combination of the Schwarzinator in defence and Mega Fauna up front means the RBF Socceroos are great odds at 100/1. Put a grand down and you'll be swimming in cash and girls/guys come July 9 in Berlin. My money's already on.

Simunic: dirtiest player ever?

2006-06-23T08:12:00.000+10:00

Now, the Round Ball Footy blog doesn’t pretend to be full of professional Round Ball Footy analysts or statisticians or historians.

But, we do know that it’s a rare occasion when a ‘player’ (so-called) manages to receive 3 yellow cards and 2 red cards in the one game.

Simunic: he just oozes dirtiness!

Crap hair too.

That’s exactly why we given full votes to Josip Simunic as dirtiest player ever.

Booo!!!! And get the fuck off the pitch, finally!!!!!

We’ve won!! We’ve won!!!!

2006-06-23T08:05:00.000+10:00

(Drawn, at least.)

Auuuuussssssssieeee!!! Aussie Aussie Aussie!!

Aussssssiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! Aussssssiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

Auuuuussssssssieeee!!! Aussie Aussie Aussie!!

Aussssssiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! Aussssssiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

Here we go, here we go, here we go!!!

Here we go, here we here we here we gooooooooooo!!!

Here we here we here we here we here we here we gooooooooooooooooooooo!!!

Here we here we here we here we gooooooooooo!!!

See ya later, Croatia!!!

Hello to the 2nd round—and watch out, Italy!!!!!!

Croatia unveil 'danger-man': not mega fauna

2006-06-22T17:00:00.000+10:00

Croatian striker, Ivica Olic, has been declared fit to start against Australia tomorrow morning, replacing Ivan Klasnic.

Worringly for Croatia, he's not a mega fauna, has a worse strike rate than V-Bomber, and doesn't even play for a club called Dynamo.

Here he is, struggling with his ball control.

Dude, the ball just hit you in the face!

More dirty tricks from Aussie opponents

2006-06-21T23:38:00.000+10:00

After having been the victims of pre-World Cup smear tactics by the Japanese and Brazilian management, the Croatian media have stooped even lower to try to unsettle the Socceroos ahead of the crucial Group F match.

Croatian reporters have revealed the location of V-Bomber’s Croatian summer house, implying that it will be torn to shreds should the ‘Roos achieve their destiny of continuing to take this World Cup by storm.

Is this V-Bomber's house? Don't know, not telling.

Dukes’ villa is now being guarded by police patrol.

Sorry Croatia, no cigar this time. You should have stuck with the old chestnut, ‘Oooh, help, Socceroos play nasty and they disrespect FIFA officials’ (lies, by the way). That’s worked before. We don’t think real estate is the answer to your worries this time.

Try practicing your shots on goal (I hope to hell that we are!).

The Maestro speaks … the world listens

2006-06-21T22:05:00.000+10:00

Guus here, for another update for my friends, the Round Ball Footy boys.

I have a fair bit to say today, and you might know that I can sometimes talk on and on, so you must be patient with me. I know you like Guus, so listen one minute...

Round Ball Footy boys asked me to give all Round Ball Footy fans a brief run-down of the boys’ preparation for the next game against Croatia—a team I haven’t been manager of before, but I can say to you that I have seen play before.

So, I am first able to say how I am happy to see that Harry has been cleared to play. This is good, because I will start him on the bench again (don’t tell anyone, but this is my tactical plan).

Timmy and the other guys said that they are happy now, because when I had my yell at little Harry in the sheds before training the other day, he goes over to the physio for a bit of a rub to heal him a little—emotionally and physically, as well as tactically speaking, too. Harry likes to have a rub-down, ever since our plane that we fly on from Uruguay into Sydney last year.

With our other tactics and strategies, I know how the boys will want to play to beat the Croatia team. It is with tactics and strategies, and also some physical and technical style that we play tomorrow. This is important, and I know this. The boys also have been told about how this is.

I tell you now: our Australia Round Ball Footy Socceroos are in top, top shape. And they feel very much strongly that they can show to everyone that we deserve how well we play in the Cup.

Other tips for you all—cos I know how much the Round Ball Footy guys like me to let them know some secrets—are: Mega Fauna to come on in last 30 minutes is one strategy. Other tactic is Johnny Weezy to start, and also Josip will play in the second half for maybe Bresha or Chippers. I would like to play little Stan, but I won’t.

My final thing to say is how I like our referee—pommie, as you say—Graham Poll. I have a chat with him today and he is good to have a talk with. I tell him, or actually just say to him, that he is smart referee, and not to listen to Croatia when they complain, because then we can also complain, and I don’t like when everyone is complaining. Best to just not whistle so much, yes?

Good game tomorrow, but I see that we will play through the full game, and then also see about maybe Korea in one week or two. I enjoy being Korean citizen, with free taxis and islands to live on, but they won’t beat Socceroos without me as manager.

We will be going for the win, it is not the time for it to be over for us!!

Friday on my mind

2006-06-21T11:53:00.000+10:00

Well here we are Round Ball Footy fans hump day is here folks and as always I have Friday on my mind. Not for the usual reasons though. This Friday 23 June 2006 Round Ball Footy in Australia is going to go to the next level, a draw should be enough to see us safely through to the second round. Lets face it we should really be able to beat the Cro's, no goals in two games, they haven't even really come all that close to scoring.
Australia has spoken, according to the official Round Ball Footy poll, it seems Australia is confident of progressing, at least to the next stage, with 94% saying we can progress to the second round and beyond!
The Socceroos need your support, remember to go and check out our brilliant anthem for the Socceroos Look Mum, No Hands! go on, download it and sing your guts out on Friday.
We here at Round Ball Footy say BRING IT ON!

Geezer Set to Play

2006-06-21T09:58:00.000+10:00

FIFA's Disciplinary Committee has cleared Harry 'the Geezer' Kewell to play the crunch game against Croatia on Friday morning.

As this picture clearly illustratess Kewell was simply having a polite discussion with match officials, after the debacle of a refereeing display, which saw Australia cop a penalty count of 25-9.

So justice has been done. Round Ball Footy just hopes we will have an unbiased ref for the big game against the Cro's, in which a draw could be good enough for Australia qualify for the last 16 of the World Cup.

Aussies first loss in 32 years

2006-06-19T10:55:00.000+10:00

A nice air swing by Ronaldo

Australia have suffered defeat at the World Cup finals for the first time in 32 years. Not a bad record in the world's most prestigious sporting event.

The two goals to nil defeat has seen them drop off the top of the table in Group F to sit second behind Brazil, who are now safely through to the next round. With three points from their opening two games Australia is still poised to qualify along with Brazil for the second round.

Their next game against the Cro's promises to be a tightly contested battle - Croatia have failed to score a single goal in this campaign. Although against Japan, they did manage to hit the crossbar once, and had a good shot on target when they missed a penalty kick. Attack it seems is not their strong point.

Their defense is tight having conceded only one goal, however they are yet to contend with the revelation of the World Cup, a Mega Fauna . Australia has one of the finest exponents of Mega Fauna in Joshua Kennedy. He did not get a run against Brazil but is sure to be champing at the bit to come on and terrorise the Croatian defense Friday morning.

Important announcement...

2006-06-17T15:30:00.000+10:00

We know that everyone is gearing up for the big Oz-Brazil clash this weekend, but don't forget one thing...

Spare a cheer or 3 for the Blue Samurai as they line up against Croatia in the curtain-raiser. A Japan win would do wonders for the 'Roos chances of making the round of 16.

We know that they were a bit cheeky in the lead-up to their game against the Green & Gold, took numerous dives, and snuck in a dubious goal against us, but we've all moved beyond that. We've had our whinge and as a nation Australia does the sporting thing and moves on. That's right. Ok?

(Plus, now they've finally figured out that Timmy Cahill fouled them in the box in the dying minutes, I think we're all square.)

So, c'mon you Blue Samurais, do your Asian neighbours proud (that's us remember) and give it your all against Croatia!!

Hopefully they can show the same fearsome samurai spirit displayed by Bresha in this picture here (we think he was planning this if things got nasty in our match against Japan, but The Boss dragged him before he could unleash his mighty Fighting Crane stance). Feel free to use this one against Croatia, boys.

So remember: it's blue all the way tomorrow night - from Munich to Nuremberg!

This just in from The Boss...

2006-06-16T15:12:00.000+10:00

First, I must say how I’m very much pleased with our boys how they performed against the Japanese game. Some things are not to like so much, but there are many things more to enjoy about the match.

I can say also that I have watched how Brazil and Croatia play together and I think also there are some things I like seeing there.

This makes me think that many of our boys will be important, to play to our plan. Timmy and Johnny both were a bit stupid to get that card and so with Vincent and Craig.

But I know that from watching the games from before we can stick to our tactical play and we have much belief in how we approach our next game with Brazil.

-----------------------

Sweet!! Round Ball Footy again thanks the Maestro Guus for his input.

So, what can we take out of that? Will The Boss be going all out for a win against the Samba Show-Ponies?

The way he was winking at us, Round Ball Footy reckons Guus is the man to rev up the ‘Roos to take it to the world champs. Will we be seeing Timmy the Hero and the Jaffle line up on Monday morning (AEST)?

You bet your sweet Guus we will!

'Keeper of the week

2006-06-15T12:20:00.000+10:00

Well here we are a little over 1/3rd of the way through round one, so time to catch our breath and take a quick look at the stats so far.

RBF's keeper-of-the-week award goes to Richard Kingston from Ghana. No surprise really since in the sole game he has played so far he has conceded 2 goals and been forced to save 10 attempts on goal by the Italians. Here's a technical tip for you Richard - trying kicking the ball a little further from your goals next match. But thanks to his brave efforts, the Ghanains haven't been asked to catch the next bus out of town.. at least not yet. Czechoslovakia might buy them a ticket this week.

Richard, now a Turkish citizen, is also known as Farok Gursoy. For some reason he was overlooked by his adopted country. In a bold move by the Ghanain manager, he was not picked for the 2006 African Cup of Nations and he made only one appearance in qualifying for the 2006 FIFA World Cup (he managed a clean sheet in the 30 minutes of the game he actually played).

Round Ball Footy salutes a worthy contender for this week's award. Mark "sticky" Schwarzer was never in contention, with only 1 save against a paltry attack. Sorry mate, you might have better stats this week.

More World Cup fun

2006-06-14T15:52:00.000+10:00

Round Ball Footy is still celebrating the Socceroos' joyous first World Cup win. And now we've found something else great to cheer about: Togo.

Reasons to like Togo:

their best player, Emmanuel Adebayor, is a Mega Fauna

they know voodoo

they wear the Green & Gold

it's their first World Cup ever

Nothing ever goes right for them:
- their coach quit 3 days before their first game, then re-joined the morning before kick-off
- they almost didn't even get their national anthem played at their opening match
- they managed to take an early lead, then were reduced to 10 men after their captain got sent off, and lost in the second half

their fans wear muu-muus

they do a cool little victory dance after scoring goals (see above)

A good omen?

2006-06-14T12:49:00.000+10:00

Ok, I know it's only early days but it doesn't hurt to dream......

After last night's three games, which included Brazil's 1-0 defeat of the Croats, Australia is sitting proudly atop the Group F standings. A cheeky draw against the Samba Kings this monday morning (Eastern Australia Time) would enable us to stay in first place.

Two-goal hero Timmy Cahill is also currently in first place for the coveted Golden Boot on the official Fifa Goal Scorers list, with his two goals in 38 minutes seeing him have the highest strike rate of anybody at the tournament.

If there was a list for Genius of the World Cup, well we all know who would be on top, our very own (for now) Maestro Guus.

What a man!

What a team!

Bring on the Samba Kings, lets see what they have for our table-topping heroes!

If only it could be this way forever........

Oooh, that bloody ref!!

2006-06-13T16:53:00.000+10:00

Round Ball Footy couldn't keep quiet any longer ... it's time for an extended rant.

That bloody ref nearly cost us the game - plus the hopes and dreams of a nation historically hard-done by on the world stage of Round Ball Footy.

Notwithstandingly your opinion of the alleged opening 'goal', numerous soft free kicks against the Green & Gold gifted undeserved chances to the Blue Samurai and lost us possession in the midfield. A little bit of spine in response to the constant diving and simulations displayed by Japan wouldn't have gone astray either.

Well, well, well, Essam Abd El Fatah, hope you weren't planning a holiday to Australia any time soon.

83 minutes into the Socceroos crucial pool game against Japan, and millions of Aussie supporters were cursing you every which way. And only some late Socceroo magic saved you from the full extent of the Maestro's wrath.

And this even after the devious comments in the match lead-up - which were so obviously intended to sway the ref's opinion - about the unfairness of Australia's hard-nosed game-play.

So, what's the damage Mr Abd El Fatah has inflicted upon us?

First, the penalty count (22-11) doesn't have much of an effect in the cool light of day, other than having caused a few hoarse throats from yelling obscenities. But the 4 yellows (RBF counted 2 for 'backchat'!!??!!) Essam issued sure sting.

It looks like the naughty foursome Vincenzo, Moore, Timmy the Hero, and John Weezy might have to watch themselves in their next two matches.

Hopefully, we get assigned a ref with a little more big-match experience for the Brazil and Croatia games, because there's sure to be even more mind games from Parreira and Kranjcar in the coming week - trying to put some more pressure on the refs to over-penalise Australia.

One final note - after all this whistle-blowing, how the hell did Luke 'The Cutter' Wilkshire manage to stay out of the ref's book. He's been a bit sluggish of late, and Guus wouldn't be sweating if he was the only 'Roo forced to do a bit of bench-warming from here on in.

Ok, rant over. I feel much better now.

Socceroos 3 - Blue Samurai 1

2006-06-13T11:55:00.000+10:00

Round Ball Footy
We're off to Germany
Round Ball Footy
On our way to victory!

We sure are! What a win!

The four-pronged attack of Mega Fauna, John Aloisi, The Duke and of course two-goal hero Timmy Cahill that Maestro Guus played in the last 10 minutes only underlines the true genius of the man.

Here's what Lucas Neill had say: "In big pressure situations he makes big decisions and he has that canny knack of pulling them off and he did that again today, he's such a genius, a masterstroke."

With the Blue Samaurai acrobatically diving whenever they could feel the ground tremble with the presence of a Socceroo, they saved their best dive till last: 3 goals in ten minutes seeing them crash with a tremendous thud.

YEEEESSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!

2006-06-13T01:30:00.000+10:00

What a result!!!!!!!!!!

Round Ball Footy is not usually prone to hyperbole. But in this case, you can forgive us for saluting a PHENOMENAL RESULT!!!!!!!!!!!

3 goals in the last 9 minutes exemplifies the fighting spirit of this great team.

More on this game to come...

Goalkeeping II

2006-06-13T01:10:00.000+10:00

Japan v Australia

So was it a goal or not?

The Monk says YES. Schwarzer mis-read the situation and even though he was taken out by the Japanese attack, this did not affect his goalkeeping ability. The goal, while scrappy and horrible to watch, was allowable.

Did Timmy Cahill give away a penalty after he scored his first goal?

YES, but don't tell anybody.

Lies, damn lies!!

2006-06-12T15:58:00.000+10:00

Understandably, the Boss has reacted angrily to unfounded accusations directed at the mild-mannered Socceroos.

Some opponents - amazingly two of the coaches of teams in our pool - are implying that we are "overly physical", "un-sportsman-like" - and even that we "attack player's ankles"!!!

Well, Round Ball Footy is deeply offended by such blatant lies and cynical attempts to influence referees.

The picture above should dispel any illogical suggestions that ANY player in the green and gold attacks ankles.

Here is a copy-book example of how to dispossess a skilled opponenet such as the Ruud. Nice one, Vincenzo, hope you have a blinder against those Blue Samurai and their schemey coach.

Babe World Cup

2006-06-12T15:49:00.000+10:00

Further to the fiercely debated poll below - here is some more off-field World Cup nonsense.

Check out the alternative tournament:

Babe World Cup

What's in a name?

2006-06-12T15:38:00.000+10:00

So, by now we're all aware of the simple equation:
football + soccer = Round Ball Footy.

There is plenty more word-play craziness going on at the World Cup. The Dutch v now non-existent Serbia-Montenegro is a prime example.

SCG (which stands for what?) was represented by 17 -ics in its squad of 23 - and you can add to that its iccy coach, Ilija Petkovic. The collared Holland - the Dutch from the Netherlands - is also confusing punters with its 3 names for the country.

Round Ball Footy was also delighted to note the Dutch combination of Arjen Robben, Robin van Persie, Percy Snejder. (Delighted, that is, until we found out that Snejder's name is actually Wesley.)

The only answer that RBF has for all this nonsense is to why they wear so much bloody Orange. Something or other to do with their old ruler, King of Orange, ummm, something like that. Why don't you go check Wikipedia?

Anyhow, on to the cut-throat Socceroos-Japan game...

Win free Round Ball Footy merchandise

2006-06-11T17:01:00.000+10:00

Yes, thats correct Round Ball Footy has decided to give away some of our sweet Round Ball Footy merchandise.

Just send a photo of your Round Ball Footy World Cup party to roundballfooty@roundballfooty.com. The best ones will receive an official t-shirt as seen above. So go on, get partying!!!!!!!!

Remember official Round Ball Footy merchandise can be purchased from www.roundballfooty.com at anytime for only $15 how cheap is that!

Year of the Mega Fauna?

2006-06-11T16:34:00.000+10:00

Well 6 games in, we have already seen some cracking goals and the mighty Trinidad pick up a point against Sweden! And yet one important question remains unanswered.....

Is this the World Cup that will be remembered for the scoring feats of the Mega Fauna?

As Round Ball Footy first announced to the world on 8 June 2006 Australia have their Mega Fauna Joshua Kennedy - set to be unleashed against the Blue Samurai on monday night Australian time.

England have their own Mega Fauna in Peter Crouch, who is getting noticed not only for his Mega Fauna status but his robot dance goal celebrations.

How many teams will regret not having the forsight to have a Mega Fauna in their squad.

Only time will tell.

0 more sleeps!! Prediction time!

2006-06-09T12:05:00.000+10:00

It's blast-off time for Round Ball Footy World Cup Germany 2006!!

The official Round Ball Footy blog is inviting your predictions for the opening day.

Will Costa Rica produce the early upset against host Germany - a la Senegal-France 2002?

Round Ball Footy is predicting that the opening ceremony will produce one of the major shocks of the tournament:

the hot tip is that Black Eyed Peas will be joined on stage by the old Macarena lechers who have been secretly preparing in Malta for their reunion gig. (Didn't anyone else notice them in the crowd at the Malta-Japan friendly? I suspect they've made their way to Germany by posing as Maltese team officials.)

In other World Cup Entertainment news: Ricky Martin will be caught in a drug-fuelled homo-erotic party binge in Stuttgart - while singing The Cup of Life. There are worse ways to lose your dignity, I guess...

Anyhow, bring on your World Cup predictions. We want to hear them.

Poll - Who has the hotter girlfriend?

2006-06-08T16:03:00.000+10:00

Mega Fauna – Guus’ secret weapon

2006-06-08T10:47:00.000+10:00

It’s gone largely unnoticed by the media and Socceroos’ opponents, but we have a stunning revelation for Round Ball Footy fans...

Australia unveiled it’s secret attack weapon for World Cup 06 in yesterday’s kick-around against Lichtenstein:

Mega Fauna (Wombus Gigantus) – the 192cm striker Josh Kennedy – got his first cap in the Green & Gold last night. Subbed-on after half-time, he put the Socceroos in the lead for the first time in the match with a coolly-taken header.

GOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLL on debut!!!

Round Ball Footy is telling you: keep an eye on Mega Fauna!!

You heard it here first.

P.S. Thanks for the heads-up, Guus, you’re a legend, mate.

Mega Fauna stats:

Age: 23
Position: Striker
Squad #: 19
Height: 192cm
Weight: 84kg
Caps: 1 (And what a debut it was, you fabulous Mega Fauna!!!)
Cards: 0
Goals: 1 (100% strike rate!!!!)
Club: Dynamo Dresden

Goalkeeping I

2006-06-07T18:13:00.000+10:00

A message from the RBF 'keeper

In a shock move, The Guus brought on Kalac in place of Schwarzer against the under-13 squad from Liechtenstein. Unfortunately he can't defend against his own team. The Monk says the Schwarzenegger will save us, just like he did against the Netherlands. They can't win if they can't score. Croatia and Japan might get Brazillianed, but not the mighty Round Ball Footy Socceroos.

A word from the maestro...

2006-06-07T16:24:00.000+10:00

When you need to know, you should and must listen to these Round Ball Footy guys - they are in top, top shape and know what they are doing.

I am also having my thoughts posted on the tactical nature of Round Ball Footy and this will show you the tactical, strategical side of the World Cup in Round Ball Footy.

You know you can't miss these things. Pay attention to not miss out!!

Hello and welcome to the Round Ball Footy official blog.

2006-06-07T13:08:00.000+10:00

We will be posting all the most up-to-date information on the mighty Socceroos progression through the Round Ball Footy World Cup.